The Grass Is Dead!

So it was recently brought to my attention, and not too kindly, that I am not the only survivor of a shitty childhood. I was also admonished for my lack of respect toward the woman who allegedly reared me. 

First of all people, this is my outlet, get your own damn blog. 

Second, whatever lack of respect that my readers interpret is mostly intentional and has already been discussed at great lengths with not only a therapist, but the Grand Matriarch herself. She has acknowledged and apologized for her extremely poor judgement. We are cool. I speak to her often and she reminisces about shit I have heard about a bajillion times. 

And I will add here that no matter the topic, she has always been supportive of both her kids. “I’m fine with your decision to drop out of school. It’s not for everyone.” “I bet if you were a male escort or gigilo, you would make a lot of money.”  These are actual conversations that my brother and I have both had with this chick at some point. I swear right down to my Mossy Oak underwear that is the truth. 

Third, I am ready to put this in writing. And this isn’t even the tip of the iceberg here folks. I have stories that probably can’t even be translated into coherent or complete thoughts. But I’m working on that. 

So when you decide to offer up advice, make sure you know what advice to offer.

I have dealt with some of the worst people that our society has to offer in my decade plus of law enforcement. So believe me when I say that I am well aware that there have been much worse child hoods suffered by kids who had zero choice when it came to choosing what family to reside with. 

But also heed my advice. This is meant to be entertaining and hopefully give insight to whatever you want to take away. Up to you. I’ll just continue to share my sarcastic point of view from this side of the fence.