Listen, I don’t know what I am doing. Does that make sense? I have been pretending to be an adult all this time, but really I’m just a kid trapped in an adult’s body! Only I’m not nearly as adorable as Tom Hank’s character in the movie “Big.”
Growing up in various boroughs in and around Dallas, I wasn’t keenly aware of my social status until I was around 11 years old. It was then that I realized exactly how poor my family was. I just always assumed that drive-by shootings, german cockroaches and used drug needles were problems that everyone dealt with. I never… Continue reading Being Poor Used to Suck
I was always suspicious that my kids were weird, but now I have confirmed this shit. My own fault really. I’m pretty sure it comes from my parents. I walked into the kitchen a while back and witnessed what I thought was a sweet moment. I observed my daughter (Maggie) standing and staring into space,… Continue reading When do I call in the “White Coats?”
So I was carting the kiddos to school when the topic of heated car seats came up (our current grocery-hauler has none). While reminiscing about the luxury of having”bun warmers” the following conversation ensued: Me: “I miss heated seats. They were my favorite on cold mornings. The next car we get will most definitely have… Continue reading Heated Seats and Other Mysteries.
I have all these memories from my child hood that involve a whole lot of mumbling to myself. Usually, things like “What the fuck” or “What in the actual fuck?!?” One of the most common “WTF” moments would come right at the very end of every single fucking summer break. Remember when you would load into… Continue reading WTF